It's all over...

I'm relieved, in a way, however, concerned about what lies ahead now. I just read this article on gopusa.com http://www.gopusa.com/commentary/2012/11/08/patton-john-galt-calling-had-enough/ I agree; my husband and I have worked hard for a very long time, and our tax dollars continue to be sliced more ways each year, supporting more and more people who don't step up. I'm not against those less fortunate who need a helping hand. I am against those who milk the system, and don't ever get "off the dole." Our welfare system was never meant to support those unwilling to work. It was meant to be a safety net. What would be wrong with requiring welfare recipients to work, either doing what they are able to do employment-wise, or volunteering if they can't find work, something, rather than penalizing them if they get work, by taking away their benefits. Try bridging their benefits toward self-sufficiency. I've seen able bodied individuals who, rather than trying to find work, hide their abilities from the government, in order to continue to receive a paltry amount in disability benefits. They did so, mainly, because if they worked over a very minimal amount, they would lose their benefit. They were so invested in that monthly check, they refused to see beyond it, and how much better off they would be working full-time. They chose to live in abject poverty. That's just wrong. Our system is so twisted around, and broken. Our elected representatives, in a lot of ways, are the same as disability recipients. They won't change the system, because they rely on its benefits. They are career politicians who stand to benefit by NOT changing the system. It pays them to keep it in place.

Elder Abuse: Dealing with oppositional-defiant family members...

There is a lot of published material dealing with difficult people, negotiating and compromising, and less than ideal extended family situations.  When a family is is trying its best to work out an end-of-life arrangement for a surviving, and failing, parent, it is tough under the best of circumstances.  It can be next to impossible when one family member is anti-social, narcissistic, and oppositional-defiant.

Some individuals want everything their way.  There is no compromise; it's their way, or the highway.  Those types of persons will sabotage the family's best intentions, they will seemingly agree, and then set about doing something different, they will find things to argue about when there is nothing to argue about.  They will constantly make inane demands.  These types of individuals will compare what they think they are getting, or think they should get, to that which others have gotten, or what they think others have gotten.  They are never happy because they are miserable, unhappy people, and nothing makes them happy - NOTHING.

The sad thing is that the one that suffers from all of this thoughout the entire time dealing with it is the parent - the one everyone is trying to help.  The parent bears the brunt of the adult child's inability to work in the family unit.  The adult child, in essence, never grew up, and expects the failing, elderly parent to continue to parent them, step in on their behalf, defend them, support them, fight for them in the family unit.  Unfortunately, the parent is no longer able to do so, and what ends up happening constitutes emotional elder abuse, if not physical and financial elder abuse, as well.

There are no easy answers, unfortunately.  That is the inherent problem.  The family has to deal with an unreasonable, irrational individual, usually one that has unfettered access to the failing parent.  And, the failing parent, due to their failing, has little, or no defense to say enough, stop it, behave, as a parent might normally say.  Going through the court system takes time, and is financially taxing, at the least.  Meanwhile, the stress and strain continue.

Using a power of attorney for healthcare, and asking for assistance from healthcare providers may help, as well as contacting the county's elder abuse unit, to ask for assistance.  Elder abuse, in any form, is against the law.  Elder abuse usually occurs by someone the elder knows.  Sad, but true.

When an elder is isolated from other family members, their email is censored, their phone conversations are eavesdropped, or cut short, or monitored, so that they are afraid to talk, that is elder abuse.  When an elder is brainwashed by one family member that all the other family members are against them and the perpetrator, that is elder abuse.  When everyone else in the family is wrong, and the perpetrator is right, about anything and everything, that is elder abuse.

There are plenty of good attorneys that specialize in elder law; find one and seek a consultation!

Once in a Blue Moon...

Maybe we will see a "Blue Moon" here in the Northwest!  I'll be outside, just after sunset, checking to see what color the full moon is tonight...

http://www.space.com/17381-will-the-blue-moon-really-be-blue-video.html

United States Budget Dilemma - WATCH THIS VIDEO!!!

Life on the farm...

Summer in North Idaho sure beats the AZ heat!  Unfortunately, there have been fires in the NW, and it has been warmer than usual.  It is still nice here.  I've managed to pick a lot of berries and made lots of jam, am waiting for the apples to ripen, and finally finished the front landscaping.  We've spent a lot of evenings bar-b-queing, enjoying the sunsets from the deck, and watching the humming birds feed.

Enjoy a few of the photos...

It is a wonderful world...

My cousin sent this link to me; it is definitely worth time to watch.

Thank you to the BBC!

http://www.youtube.com/embed/auSo1MyWf8g?rel=0

If it ain't broke? Well, what if it is?

A recent experience at John C. Lincoln Hospital - Deer Valley, Phoenix, AZ, leads me to wonder whether our whole health care system should just be scrapped. When a person is admitted through an emergency department (which went smoothly enough) and then, family members looking out for the patient can't seem to connect with the hospitalist or the cardiologist caring for the patient, there is something terribly wrong.

Nursing staff was wonderful; no complaints. This is a physician problem. A note was placed in the patient's chart requesting that the hospitalist &/or cardiologist who had admitted the patient (which was never determined who exactly did admit the patient) contact the patient's son (who also has power of attorney for health care). No contact. A day passed, and an echo-cardiogram was allegedly performed by someone, presumptively the cardiologist. No contact. The patient's son then, finally, demanded that the charge nurse contact a physician on-call and have that doctor call him in the patient's room. The poor cardiologist who called hadn't ever seen the patient, and had no clue what his/her status was, and was out of the loop. He was able to report the findings of the echo, but that was really it. No other contact from anyone who had any knowledge of the patient's case.

By the next morning, the patient wanted to go home, and there didn't seem to be any reason for the patient to stay. No physician contact, either in person, or by phone. Finally, by lunch-time, the patient was checked out, against medical advice (AMA), except in this case, there was no medical advice by which to check out against!

Needless to say, the patient's son won't be taking the patient to John C. Lincoln, Deer Valley again. Bad experience, and it could have been a bad outcome if the patient hadn't had a family member to look out after him/her.

Something is broke, and needs fixing...

Mighty Yosemite

This time-lapse photography (video) is worth a watch!  If you've never been to Yosemite, it gives you a tour of the park, and an over-view of the highlights.  Nothing does Yosemite justice, other than being in the middle of it, however, this is the next best thing!

Yosemite Range of Light - Shawn Reeder

http://www.bing.com/videos/watch/video/yosemite-range-of-light-time-lapse/200lfn4w

Life Changes...

I've missed a couple of weeks because - we, meaning my husband and I, have now entered that stage of our lives that we all (or most, anyway) wonder about with anticipation, and sometimes dread.  What will happen when mom (or dad) has to move in?  It just happened to us, and it has been an interesting, and actually somewhat pleasant, adventure.

Lon's mother, Ann, came to visit us for a month, with the idea of seeing if she might want to live with us, or near by in an assisted living facility.  We all had a great time during that month, and discovered that she is great company, and still very full of life.  There had been some question about that from certain other persons who will remain unnamed.  At the end of the month, Ann decided, ultimately, that she wanted to go back home (to Los Angeles) for the time being, and see how she did by herself.

About a week later, she called us and said she was ready to come back to Phoenix and move in with us.  We had expected we might get that call, but perhaps not quite that soon.  Without going into the details, we weren't sure it was really her idea, but in the end, we went to L.A., helped her pack up her belongings from the 60+ years of possessions in her home, loaded up a trailer, and off we drove, across the desert, back to Phoenix.

We had interesting discussions on the way home - to her new home.  She began the transition right away; she has been adapting pretty well, considering her age, and having lived in one place for a very long time.  There are others that aren't doing so well with it, but that's another story for another day, and not our focus, or concern, other than the ill effect it might have on Ann.  We shield her as best we can, and continue on the journey.

And, a journey it is.  She loves the different landscape, and plant life in the desert.  We have taken her on a couple of drives to show her the spring bloom in the desert, which she really enjoyed, along with some sights in Sedona.  She is looking forward to a trip to Zion National Park on our way to summer out of the heat in North Idaho.  She is also looking forward to her family visiting her in her new home, as they always have visited her in the past.  Again, a new paradigm for some, and some who don't seem to make changes very well, and not as well as an 87 year old great grandmother.

Ann had all but stopped using her very nice Apple computer; we got that set up for her and she is back to emailing, and surfing the web, which is great mental activity.  She plays a mean game of scrabble, and works her crossword puzzles everyday.  She's purchased some new clothes, which is probably the first time in maybe 10 years or more that she's done so.  She only has one pair of shoes, and that is the next purchase on the list.

She is back to interest in cooking, and eating!  She has always been a great cook, so seeing that re-develop a bit has been fantastic.  She is coming out of her shell.  Watching an 87 year old use FaceTime with a greatgrandchild is worth the price of admission!  It's all good.

So, the upshot of this is I can highly recommend it to anyone who might be dreading it.  It wasn't so long ago that extended families living together were the norm, not the exception.  It's enhanced our lives.  Try it; you might like it.

It's a wrap!

Most people are familiar with the phrase, "wrap your mind around that."  The mind is not a physical thing, but is ethereal.  The mind functions outside of space, and time to some extent.  Think dreams.  Wrap your mind around that!

So, when and why did this euphemism morph into "wrap your brain around that," or, "wrap your head around that."  The brain and the head are physical things.  The brain resides inside the head.  The last time I checked, you can't take your brain outside your head, nor can you wrap either one around anything very easily, more than once anyway.

We can let our minds wander anywhere, and wonder at anything, anytime.  We can't do that with our brains or our heads.  People need to think about that when they use the phrase, and use it correctly, the way it was first meant to be used.  It just doesn't sound right when it is stated incorrectly.  Sorry, people; you all need to wrap your minds around that.

Inspiration...

Where does it come from, and where does it go?  I was inspired earlier today, and knew exactly what I wanted to write about, and now, I lack any inspiration to write a word.  I thought about blogging on the expectation of email privacy (or the lack thereof, actually).  I also considered a couple of other topics, both of which tickled my fancy this week.  Maybe I'm just tired, after a long week; maybe I am dreading Monday, when I put Ann on a plane to go home after a wonderful, month-plus visit.  Or, it could be a combination of things, all contributing to a big NOTHING.  So, I may post more later when I am inspired again.  In the meantime, I am going to continue reading "Imagine," by Jonah Lehrer.  It is inspiring!

A Breath of Fresh Air

So my cousin wrote and asked me if, in essence, she was entitled to drive on a nice day with her windows rolled down, without having to breath the cigarette smoke emitting from the car in front of (or next to) her.  This is an interesting question, given all of the recent legislation regarding no smoking in public places, such as restaurants, hospitals, airplanes, airports, and other public use locations.  Streets that we all have to share together, and when we are virtually trapped in our cars, theoretically are the same sort of public location.  Additionally, with all of the public outcry about talking on cell phones while driving, and TEXTING while driving, I've never understood how smoking while driving is o.k.

Talk about a distraction.  Nicotine is a DRUG and alters consciousness - that is why people smoke, after all.  I won't get into the politics of cigarettes; that would take a novel.  Suffice it to say that smoking while driving probably won't change anytime soon, however, it is a valid argument to question being subjected to others' smoke while driving.  Maybe that is enough to get our legislators' attention and perhaps eventually get the law changed.  I like the analogy of driving to airplanes, and the elimination of smoking on airplanes.  If you can't get away from the smoke, then it shouldn't be allowed.  When a person is driving, and in traffic, en route to a specific destination, they can't get away from the smoke coming in their windows from the cars around them.  Even if they roll up their windows, it still comes in through the vents.  We've all experienced that, too!  It's nauseating, to those of us that are especially affected adversely to cigarette smoke.  Smoking has become the exception, rather than the rule; make it illegal while driving, just as it is on airplanes, and in other public places, other than in designated smoking areas.  That way, if someone doesn't want to be around it, they can avoid the designated smoking area.  Give us all a breath of fresh air when we are driving on a nice spring day, or any other time, for that matter.

Springtime in the Desert

I took a drive this afternoon, just to see if the wild flowers and desert blooms were under way yet. I wasn't disappointed. It is still early but the flowers are peeking out. The cacti are showing signs of a beautiful bloom this year. We haven't had a lot of rain but last week's downpour helped.

My husband drove me, and his mother, out toward Wickenberg, and there were some great wildflowers blooming alongside the highway. Ann, Lon's mom, is a beautiful wildflower in full bloom, too. We are lucky to have her gracing us with a visit for about a month, and hoping she'll decide to stay permanently.

Bullet finished his second week at Westworld and did very well with more ribbons and lots of peppermints. I took a bag of apples to him on Thursday and offered him one. He literally turned his nose up at it, as if to say, "I only accept peppermints now!" Is it my imagination or is the horse spoiled? He's a wild flower of a different kind!

"Misquotes" - My Rant for the Day!

Why do people put words in "quotes?" (and, I'm being sarcastic with the use of the word quotes; read on)  I've never understood it!  It is overused, overrated, misunderstood, abused, and quite frankly, stupid.  Use quotation marks [ “ ” ] to set off material that represents quoted or spoken language. Quotation marks also set off the titles of things that do not normally stand by themselves: short stories, poems, and articles.  Period.  Or, should I say, "Period."  See what I mean.  "Stupid."  And, to make matters worse, some individuals will take it a step further, when they are actually trying to quote someone else, and MISQUOTE, using quotation marks!  If it isn't an EXACT "quotation," lose the quotation marks.  Of course, there are always the thieves who don't use quotation marks, purposefully stealing others' material to use as their own.  Plagiarism - a different topic for another time.

I don't know if English grammar and usage have been tossed aside in school, or people are just lazy.  Oh, and that's another point - the word "quote" is a verb, not a noun.  "Quotation" is a noun.  More importantly, to the best of my knowledge, there is no such word as "quotate."

A very good friend of mine recently made a valid point - the English language has been dumbed down almost to the point of no return.  I'm not quoting her, but that was her point.  Language can be such a beautiful thing, and we misspell it, misconstruct it, yes, we dumb it down to nothing.  We are lazy.  It doesn't take that much effort to write a decent sentence.  "Duh."

Minds, Ideas, Events, and People

I'm in a beautiful place this week, Monterey, CA, and have had plenty of time to THINK without interruption. That doesn't happen very often any more.

"Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people."  I saw this posted on FaceBook this week.  I don't know who the original author was, but it rings true.  Ideas are abstract thoughts, yet to be realized or demonstrated in reality; events are facts happening in reality, not neccessarily good or bad, although they might be one or the other; people are actors, good or bad, and discussing them is typically called gossip.  Nothing good comes of it, and it doesn't solve anything.

Discussing ideas is problem-solving at its core; discussing events is after the fact and usually solves nothing, although it might avoid repeating history; discussing people usually is secretive, hurts feelings, and makes enemies, real or imagined.

Often it is difficult for people to truly discuss ideas, or brainstorm, because agendas get involved, they want to involve events, and/or people, and who did what to whom, and it digresses into less than brainstorming, or problem-solving.  Mediation is about ideas, not about events, legalities, or who did what, and that's why I like it, have done it as a professional for many years, and recommend it.

In today's world, we could use more ideas, fewer events, and people?  Well, I won't comment on that.  That's a very personal perspective, and each person is entitled to their opinion.  People, whether in a family, a community, a nation, or as the world community, should consider trying to open their minds to ideas, and stop focusing on events, and ignoring individual actions and the gossip that follows.  Many times, individuals need, desperately crave, attention, and will do anything, positive or negative, to get that attention.  If their attempts are ignored, and ideas are the focus, then eventually, just maybe, this world will become a place in which we all want, and can continue, to live together.

We are on our way home, to a new chapter; exciting times.  Lots of ideas, looking forward to events, and hoping all the people in our lives will be open to the ideas.

Friday Fried...

What a week!  I know I'm not the only person on the planet trying to get taxes done, needing to work whilst doing so, having a list of "other to-dos" to do, including a software upgrade, in order to get taxes done, and so on, and so on.  As I said on FB recently, "the clock always moves faster..."

My topic of discussion this week, relevant for my clients, is that of title searches, why we do them when transferring property into a living trust, and the interesting things we may find there, unbeknownst to us previously.  Us, being the trustor, and the drafting lawyer...

It very well may be that, at some time in the past, a person had reason to sign a document pertaining to an investment, or other encumbrance on their real property, that actually was something more than they realized, like a Joint Tenancy Deed transferring an undivided one-half interest to someone else, that they did NOT intend to transfer.  When the encumbrance was paid, the Joint Tenancy Deed was not extinguished, or otherwise released.  Big surprise, when a cursory title search, just to be safe, turns this beauty up, along with subsequent mortgages that should have questioned the Deed.  But, no, it is just sitting there, minding it's own, very important, business.  Tracking down the joint tenant holder to obtain a reconveyance, after twenty-some-odd years is a task in and of itself, if anyone wants to wake that sleeping giant.  What to do?  Well, it all depends, but the lesson is that it IS important to check title on real property from time to time, and not just assume that all is well.

Which dovetails to my earlier blog, WYSIWYG in Estate Planning...you have to LOOK, in order to see, often times.  Most people don't look at their estate plans very often, if at all.  Review, people, review.  It really isn't as painful as it sounds, and can actually be enjoyable, if you like your lawyer!  What a notion.  It's like spring housecleaning, in a way.  Clean out the cobwebs, make room for some new stuff, clear the clutter from a long, cold winter!

It is spring, after all, and what better time for all sorts of fun activities!  My horse, Bulletproof, is doing well.

Now, I just need to get on him, and ride!

It's Friday, and I'm fried...are you?

News & Views in the Law: WYSIWYG in Estate Planning

News & Views in the Law: WYSIWYG in Estate Planning: Is WYSIWYG really true with Estate Planning? Estate Planning attorneys advise that, as a rule, a client should always have a will. This i...

Never Jump Off a Moving Train and other Pearls

My husband and I took a three-week dream vacation to Italy; we took over 600 photos, and had the time of our lives.  "Life" being the operative word - I'm lucky to still have one!  We used public transportation during the entire trip; we didn't rent a car.  Driving with other crazy Italian Alfa lovers (we own one); no way.  So, off we went, by plane, train, and taxi.

At one point in our journey, and it was a journey, we ended up in Maria Alm, Austria.  You might ask how a trip to Italy took us to Austria; that's another day's blog.  To get to the point; we spent one day seeing everything Mozart in Salzburg, and at the end of the day, took the train back to Maria Alm.  Part of any train trip is watching the signs as we approached each stop, to see if that was our exit.  It was late, dark, and we were tired.  It just so happened that at Schlossberg, there were no signs visible from our car on the train, prior to pulling into the station and stopping.  One thing to know about trains in Europe (Italy and Austria anyway) they pull in, they stop, you get off immediately, and they pull out.  Two minutes, maybe.  We had asked the conductor earlier which stop we would be looking for, and he said Schlossburg was the last stop for the night.  Relief, the train would stop and we would have plenty of time!

So the train did stop, and we were looking for signs, couldn't see any.  We moved toward the front of the train.  No conductor to be found.  We finally decided we better just get off.  The train and the station were deserted.  We didn't want to sleep on the train!  The doors on these trains open and close automatically.  Lon took the luggage and got off.  Just as I started to get off the last step, the door started to close, with me in it, and the train started moving.  It was one of those moments where time stops; the worse that could have happened had I stayed on the train would have been a 5 minute ride back to the prior stop, get off, take a taxi back to Schlossburg.  But, nooooo...Lon looked at me, I looked at him, our eyes locked, and he said, "JUMP!"  As I jumped, I felt the door grap at my jacket; I don't even want to think what would have happened had it kept my jacket with me in it!  It doesn't seem like those trains are moving very fast when they first pull out of the station, but I hit the ground running; I didn't fall.  How, I don't know, but I didn't.  Jumping one second later, and my run would have put me right into a large pole, but, and my knees were pretty sore the next day, but otherwise, unscathed.  Never jump off a moving train...

Which leads me to my real point - if you live in Moscow, Idaho, which we no longer do, never have fun with your friends on a Friday night in downtown Moscow.  Really, Moscow PD?  Do you have nothing better to do than harass pedestrians because they hailed a ISP trooper while he had his lights on enroute somewhere, and one pedestrian stepped off a curb, in doing so, into a marked parallel parking spot?  No blocking a lane of traffic, no impeding ISP's progress, no real "interferring", but, REALLY, an infraction, and you ARREST the pedestrian for it, and THEN, in addition, give him a ticket for "pedestrian under the influence?"  No field sobriety test, no breathalyzer, no blood test.  Hmmm, seems like a proof problem to me.  Really?  Why doesn't MPD just make it official, put on their jack boots and goose step down Main Street at the next City-sponsored parade.  Really!

NEVER STEP OFF A CURB IN MOSCOW, IDAHO, if you know what's good for you.